Saturday, 14 May 2011

Stressed Out

Ever feel like you don't want to write anymore? I don't know what happened or exactly when, but something clicked in me this week and I am seriously considering stopping my blog. I think I over worked myself and put such high expectations on what I was doing that I am feeling a little burnt out. It became a bit too addictive, the surfing, researching, tweeting, and trying to figure out what I should post about next. I was always wondering, should I write something mommy centered, environment centered, something funny? I am sure all bloggers go through this, what to write, should I write, is my content any good? Don't get me wrong, I like blogging and it really is a creative outlet that I am enjoying, but should it feel like work? Should I feel guilt if I haven't written in a few days or a week? Does anyone even care about what I am writing? I know it's my blog and I can pretty much write about what ever I want, but I do want it to be interesting. I think every writer has a feeling of wanting to be liked and wanting their work to be enjoyed by others, including me.

I went through some things this week that were more important than being on the computer, things that I didn't want to talk or write about. I felt the serious pull of real life problems and issues that made me feel like being on the computer was the last place in the world I wanted to be. The stress of the real life stuff (my sick cat who needed surgery, there you have it) and the guilt of not blogging made me feel so stressed out that I was wondering, what am I doing? Why has blogging become so important that I need to feel guilty about it? Maybe I am just one of those people that needs to feel guilty about everything. I know as a parent I certainly feel that way. But does it really need to spill into my creative outlet?

So I am going to take things a little more slowly. I don't know when I'll write, or if I'll even continue, but it's good to get this off of my chest. I need to feel a little less stressed out and a little more calm. If I take a some time to figure it all out without any pressure or guilt maybe I can reorganize my life to fit it all in, but as it stands right now, it's all just a little too much.

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